Monday, October 30, 2006


Topic.. Relationships. What can we do to curb the increasing trend of muslim youths today indulging in BGR?

This is my own view on the topic, from what I've learnt..we are never free from errors.. so please do correct me if I'm wrong..

First, lets get to the root of the cause. Why do muslim youths nowadays indulge in BGR?

Every teenager will reach a stage in thier growing years where they will start to have feelings for the opposite sex. This is natural. For muslims, when they reach this stage(baligh) that is when they are bound to the Islamic Law(Syariat Islam) in thier lives. That is when it is wajib for them to uphold the pillars of Islam and also wajib to adhere to the Islamic law in all aspects of life.

Majority of muslim youths nowadays don't understand this. Around this period is also when youths start to be more rebellious. Youth, immaturity and raging hormones might also be the cause. So this is also a stage where parents have to help guide thier children of the different new feelings and experiences they are encountering and more importantly keep them rooted to Islamic principles.

But what is the common scenario today? Many muslims youths are not educated in Islamic principles. Parents also don't really do much to guide their children..some even encourage them!? Thus, Islam is not enforced in most muslim youths and they act according to how they feel.. the natural way. No rules, nothing to stop them. They are not afraid of Allah SWT, they don't even know what it is to be a muslim!?.. thus committing sins is nothing to them.

Not being guided by not understanding Islam in one thing.. worse, they get influenced by their common surroundings.. stories of love, sex and everthing that fulfill human's desires from whats on t.v., movies, music, show of public affection.. influences from non-Islamic sources. Thus, most now become muslims only by name. In nature, they behave just like any non-muslim or even worse. Thier belief(aqidah) in Allah SWT and Islam as a way of life is weak, almost non-existant.

So now we know the root of the cause. Therefore it is imperative that we start guiding youths from young. Instill in them the basic values of Islamic priciples. Focus on educating about the boundaries of relationship between a guy and a girl. They must understand what is right and what is wrong in Islam and why. And the parents also have to be aware of the importance of guiding and nurturing their kids.

What about youths that have passed that stage? Those who are already indulging in such acts?

The problem now is that it has become more serious as muslim youths are at another level.. pre-marital sex. Therefore, most muslim societies now are concentrating more on bringing it down to "no pre-marital sex". But we cannot stop there. We have to keep going to bring it down to no pre-marital relationship! Why? Because that is Islam.

Can we say this?!..Now it's 2006..times have changed.. pre-marital relationship is so common, that its better to leave it that way. We must follow according to changes in time and trend..

This is not right.. rules are rules, what is original from al-Quran and as-Sunnah, cannot be changed. Islam has clearly stated that there's no pre-marital relationships and how a muslim guy and girl should behave and interact.

The cause of "pre-marital sex" is "pre-marital relationship" so its the same thing if compared to smoking. "One of the causes of cancer is smoking". We must butt out the root of the cause, then the cancer will stop!!

Thus, now the challenge is to find out ways how to bring it to another level..say no pre-marital relationship! YES only to marraige relationships!

Also start finding ways/continue educating kids and instilling in them the basic aqidah of Islam. Maybe even set up courses to remind future/current parents about the importance of educating their kids of the basic principles of Islam so that they won't be buoyed by unIslamic influences in the future.

Well this is how I feel about this..Hmm, what do you think?.. Comments are welcomed and my purpose is that we can achieve something for the good of Islam. Let's focus on solving the problem and providing solutions.

Wallahua'laam.(Allah SWT knows best)

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